Parenting today comes with books, Google, The Internet, unsolicited advices, legitimate advices, social media, and many other factors that could affect the way we raise our children. But really, there is no exact science for it. Being a mom who is exposed to the world of new and young moms these past years that I became a mom myself, I realized that there are basic things we, as parents, can only establish through everyday practice and routine. Parents pick what to teach and pass on to their kids through example. Children (especially little toddlers) imitate what people their usually around with do.
Now that we have a 3-year old girl and an almost 2-year old boy, we are more aware of what we do and say. They’re abilities and memories amaze us. Their ways and observation skills are perfect! It makes me happy how keen and smart they are growing up but then it scares me how they are little by little seeing the real world and its flaws.
As I reflect quietly at the end of a busy day, I see these things as an important part of our everyday life with the kids and how they play a big role in forming their social interaction and skills of independence. Regardless of all the technological advancements, social media pressures and marketing ploys and wherever we are, these are basically the elements of our day with our toddlers.
I was raised in a family where helpers are present but we were trained to do things by ourselves. We were taught never to be dependent on helpers to do things that we can. They are there to help us in some things but not all things. I grew up in a family where chores are part of life and that even my parents are doing them and so it becomes a natural thing for me and not a burden.
Now that I have my own kids and home, I naturally do chores with ease and skill (well, at the very least I can say I can do them well) and I let our kids see the chores and try to explain to them what we do. I see their little observant eyes linger on some things we do and try to copy some chores they find funny or interesting. We start the day by fixing our bed. Just don’t get tired of explaining to them how and why you do it. When they see others doing it too outside the home, they easily identify them too. I love how it’s a part of their lives now. I ask them to simple things for now- like can you please hand me the broom or can you please throw this in the trash can? Eventually, they’ll get it. Cooking is another thing we all love to do at home.
Practicing this at home will define how they are also outside the home. Washing their hands before and after meals and after using the toilet are important and also cleaning their toys and other mess they make. They see us cleaning the home everyday and when they do things, we start to see order already. Again, this habit will eventually be second nature to them. Also, brushing their teeth (however they hate it at this stage in their toddlerhood ) are important and we make sure they do it or we do it for them now. This aspect is a challenge now in the toddler age but it’ll get better. Cleanliness in the home is important. It keep viruses from spreading if there are and bacteria to develop. It will keep moods of everyone in the home happy and upbeat too.
These are the important magic words we use everyday now in the home as we teach the kids the habit of using them. We’ll make sure we instill in them that manners and magic words matter. And you’ll be surprised how the use of magic words even to adults make people smile. It is also a big reflection on a person’s character. Indeed these words are “magic”!
- Thank you
- Good Morning
- Good Afternoon and good evening- well, these are mostly for people they meet in the neighborhood everyday
- Good Night
- You’re Welcome
- Hello and Bye
- Excuse Me
- May I …
- Could you help…
It’s music to our ears when we hear them say these and don’t get tired of being consistent and just keep on reminding. They’ll get it eventually.
Prayer is an important part of everyday and every week. Around our home we have religious articfacts and holy items. One of the first things both our children learned is how to put their hands together and pray. Children will get it from the adults and they mimic what you do. Eventually, the task is bigger- to explain and introduce your child on the religious stories and how to do good all the time wherein they’ll have so many questions for us to answer for sure. Also, praying together matters too. If possible, pray together and assign prayer leaders and have spontaneous prayers too. It bond families and makes wonderful daily memories that they will bring forever.
After playing, it is important that kids are taught how to fix them. This will help them become responsible and independent. But to be honest, the struggle is real and is a daily constant battle! Limiting the toys that are out to play with will help lessen the struggle. Sometimes when kids see how much they are to pack away, they get lazy like adults. So if it’s just a few items kn the floor, it won’t be hard to ask them to pack away. Don’t make it a burden by using an angry tone when you ask them to pack away. Use a friendly tone and they’ll get it’s not a burdensome thing to do for a happy dad or mom. When you fix things or pack away your stuff, show them and explain to them that you’re packing away and add a little explanation.
I Love You
The sweetness of our children got me overwhelmed for a time. How did we have such affectionate kids? To be honest, being a not “touchy” person in terms of showing affection is who I am but my kids continuous to change that side of me. Sudden big kisses from the kids are so priceless. One time, our little girl while walking told me, “I love You, Mom” and every time she does my heart still melts like the first time. Don’t hesitate to show genuine love and give love. Days are so much real and happy with it.